Fazed
by pdhtgal
Summary: CHAPTER 2 UP! This is my take on the SPOILERS for Committed, with a little (okay, a lot) of Nick and Sara thrown in. Rated T for future chapters. :o)
1. Default Chapter

Disclaimer: I don't own them.

Pairings: N/S

Author's Note: I'm BACK! (I know, I've said that before…) I am thinking about finishing my previously written stories (Entrapment, etc.. ) but they are on hiatus at the moment. I think I may have put them down for too long, and now I need to get back into them. Or at least try to…

This is something that came to me while I sat in bed, so here goes. This was spawned from SPOILERS about Sara in the upcoming episode: **Committed**.

S

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_She's lying on her bed_

_Alone in the dark_

_Remembers what's said_

_Staring at the marks_

_She's in too deep_

_Crying herself to sleep_

_There's not much I can do_

She's too far away

Sara leaned back against her car and sighed. Tears brimmed in her eyes as she thought about everything that had transpired. Shaking her head, she walked over to the patch of grass that lined the parking lot. Throwing herself to the ground, she let the tears fall.

Of all the cases she had ever solved, this one had to be the most stressful. She had never had a suspect turn on her like that. Ever. She was usually flippant with them. She had been able to diffuse them most of the time. In fact, every other time until now. Leaning back against the front bumper of her Denali, she sighed again.

Sara was so lost in thought that she had not heard the footsteps coming up behind her.

"Sara?" The familiar drawl made her jump.

"Nick." She said, not turning around. She was hoping that he would walk away without making her turn around to face him.

"So, are you planning on staying there or are you actually going to get out there are solve your case?"

"It's solved." Sara said, turning away from him even more.

"That was fast." Nick commented. "Even for you."

"Well, we had a speedier time in recovering a suspect." Sara said, sniffling.

Nick walked over to sit beside her. Crouching down, he got a good look at her. "Sara, what happened to you?" Blood had dried down the side of her face and bruises and cuts were evident on her face. Nick's eyes took in the bruises and marks that ran up and down her arms as well. "Sara, have you been to a hospital?"

"I don't know what happened really. And no, I haven't been to a hospital yet."

Standing up, Nick held out his hand. "Come on, I'll go with you. In fact, I'll even drive you there.

_Yeah, Yeah_

_She needs her space_

_Whoa, Whoa_

_And sometime to think_

_I hope it's a faze_

_She's so out of place_

_And it's all thanks to you_

_So where will it end?_

Sara accepted his hand. "Nick, I'm fine."

"No, you're not, Sara."

"Nick, at the hospital, they're going to ask questions."

"So, you're a CSI. They will figure that it happened on the job." Nick was watching her. Something that happened. Something that she obviously didn't want to talk about, whatever it was.

"I don't like people thinking I am inept at my job."

"Sara, that is the last thing that anyone would ever think about you."

Sara looked at him pleadingly. "Please Nick."

"All right… Fine." Nick lifted his arms in resignation. "But I think you're making a big mistake."

"I'm not Nick… I need to deal with this on my own."

Nick nodded and turned to walk away. His Denali was parked a couple of cars over.

"Nick?"

He turned at the sound of her voice. "Yeah?"

"Please don't tell anyone."

Nick nodded. "Tell them what?"

Sara smiled crookedly at him. Her secret was safe. For now.

_All roads have their bends_

_I know you feel sleepless_

_Wishing for cupid_

_No it's not your fault_

_Stop blaming yourself_

_It was never your call_

_And I really wanna' help_

Sara gingerly walked up the stairs towards her apartment. Whatever had possessed her to get a third floor walk up apartment was beyond her. She was regretting that decision with every fiber of her being. Her whole body ached and protested with every step. Getting to the top of the third floor Sara stopped for a moment to catch her breath. She wasn't sure, but she had some how managed to injure her ribs. That was the area that was the sorest of them all.

She walked down her hall, leaning against the walls for support. She was almost at her apartment when she saw a figure standing at her door. She knew instantly who it was. She turned around and started rapidly walking in the other direction. She got to the top of the stairs and looked at them. She looked behind her and then back at the stairs. She didn't want to have to do them again. She couldn't. Sighing, she turned back around and started the trek back to her door.

"Nick, what are you doing here?"

"Isn't it obvious? I'm here to help."

Sara was frustrated and tired. She was beyond arguing with him. "Fine. Come in. Make yourself at home. I need to get changed."

Nick looked at her tattered clothes. "Let me know if you need help."

Sara shot him a look as she continued toward her bedroom.

_Yeah, Yeah_

_She needs her space_

_Whoa, Whoa_

_And sometime to think_

_I hope it's a faze_

_She's so out of place_

_And it's all thanks to you_

Moments later, she emerged, a giant tee-shirt and sweatpants instead of her usually form fitting clothing. She had wiped the blood off her face, and all that was left were the abrasions. She walked toward Nick slowly. "I may need your help with a few things after all."

"Oh?" Nick said, trying his best at acting non-chalant, but failing miserably. "What did you need help with?"

"My ribs… They're pretty sore. I need you to wrap them."

Nick looked at her. "Are you sure you don't want them looked at by a Medical Doctor?"

"Nick, trust me… This has happened to me before. I know the difference between bruised and broken."

Nick sighed, knowing that she wasn't going to relent. "Fine. Sit down in front of me."

Sara sat on the ottoman that was in front of Nick on the sofa. She lifted up the back of her shirt and winced.. Her breathing became ragged from the pain.

Nick's hands touched her ribs. "Oh, Sara… What happened?"

Sara shook her head. "I don't want to talk about it."

Nick shrugged. "Fine."

_Whoa, Whoa_

_Remember the good_

_Forget all the bad_

_She lives with her mother_

_But misses her dad_

Sara winced as Nick wrapped her ribs tightly. She didn't want to have to go to the hospital. She was afraid to tell Nick that because of what happened, she was afraid of them.

"Sara, am I wrapping this too tight?"

"No." She said, sniffling. "It's fine."

"Sara, what's wrong? Why are you crying?" Nick asked, concern laced into every word. "What's going on with you? I know we haven't spoken for what has seemed like forever, but I'm here for you Sara. I want you to know that."

"I know Nicky… I'm just not sure if I'm ready to tell you what happened." Sara whispered the last part softly. She was tired. More tired that she had been when she had pulled triple shifts. "I think I just want to sleep."

"I'll be here when you wake up Sara. I'm not going anywhere until you tell me what happened. If that takes two days, than that's what it takes." Nick said, determinedly.

Sara nodded, too tired to fight with him.

Yawning, she started to get up. "I'll be down the hall in my room. Make yourself at home. There is a spare bedroom across from mine." Sara walked down the hall, lay down on her bed and fell into a fitful sleep.

Nick sat on the couch, flipping through channels on the television, keeping a trained eye on the hallway. She could hear her talking in her sleep, but decided not to intrude just yet. He didn't want to invade her privacy.

_No it's not your fault_

_Stop blaming yourself_

_It was never your call_

_And I really wanna' help_

**Later**

Sara woke up feeling worse than when she had fallen asleep. She could see the bright green numbers glowing in front of her and she cringed. She had slept for nearly half a day. She reached for a piece of paper on her night table.

_Sara,_

_Went to the store… Your fridge was empty. Be back in an hour. _

_Nick_

Sara sighed. She had forgotten he was staying here. She wasn't sure why. She could take care of herself. Staring down at her bruised arms. Or so she had thought. Slamming her feet into her slippers, she shuffled down the hallway. She could hear the bags rustling in the kitchen, and she knew that Nick was back.

"Hi." Sara croaked from the entrance to her kitchen.

Nick turned to look at her and swallowed. She looked worse than yesterday. "Sara."

Sara stared at him. "Why are you looking at me like that?"

Nick swallowed. He wasn't sure how to put this delicately. "Sara… You don't look so good."

_Yeah, Yeah_

_She needs her space_

_Whoa, Whoa_

_And sometime to think_

_I hope it's a faze_

_She's so out of place_

_And it's all thanks to you_

"What do you mean?"

"Sara… your face… Didn't you put anything on your cuts?"

"I cleaned them, and then went to bed." Sara stepped into the kitchen and pulled out a stainless steel bowl. She gasped when she saw her reflection. "Oh my Gosh! I look horrible!"

"Sara… you're beautiful. This stuff will clear up."

"Well, I don't feel beautiful."

"Take my word for it, you are." Nick stepped toward. "Now, how are you feeling?"

"Fine."

Nick stared at her and waited for her to change her response.

"A little sore."

Nick nodded. "I called Grissom. He said he knew all about it and said that he cleared you for leave for two weeks minimum."

Sara's eyes flashed in anger. "You did what!"

"Sara, I just merely wanted to call him so that he didn't worry."

"Nick, he was on the case with me. He was there! He saw what happened. Of course he gave me leave."

Nick stepped forward. "Wait a minute, what do you mean he was there?"

"He was in the other room. He saw everything."

"And he didn't try to stop it?"

"Yes, he did!" Sara was getting more and more angry.

"Then what happened? How did you wind up with bruised ribs and black and blue everywhere else? How could he let that happen?"

"Because!" Sara said, her reasoning not making much sense.

"Sara, because is not an answer."

Sara glared at him. "Look… I don't want to talk about it."

Nick sighed. "Sara, talking about it helps. Whatever it is that happened to you is just that, happened. It's not going to happen again."

Sara stared at him defiantly. "How do you know? You weren't there. You didn't have your suspect turn on you."

"Sara, that's part of the job." Nick said, sitting down at her kitchen table. "That's what we are trained for. That's why we carry guns."

Sara shook her head. "Well, Nick, what would you do if your suspect was mentally unstable, and had you cornered in a locked room, and they were double your size? What would you do if they stole your weapon and held your own gun against your head?" Sara let tears fall from her eyes in earnest.

Nick stood up, his mouth open. "Sara… I…"

Sara silenced him by holding her hand out. "I thought I was trained to handle these types of situations, Nick. I really did. I was trained in hand to hand combat, but everything I learned went out the window when I was pinned against the wall." With those words, Sara turned around and walked back to her bedroom, closing the door behind her, leaving Nick staring after her.

_Song: Faze, by Aselin Debison, (CD: Bigger Than Me) who is a Canadian songstress. I love this song!_

Please R&R. I don't think this will be much more than a 2-3 part story… This is a first for me! I usually do longer stories ;o)


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: Still don't own them… But if George Eads were to stop by, I wouldn't be too upset by that. Wink wink, nudge nudge.

Pairings: N/S

**Authors Notes:**

**Thanks to: forensicsfan, EquestrianBabe, DarkDreamer56, Space-Case7029, Cheryl, csijunky05, mudhousejunkie, Julie, trainerker, phoenix lily.**

**Your reviews mean a lot to me! Thanks so much!**

On with the Show 

How have you been  
in the shape you were in  
I'm suprised that you got where you're going

Sara sat on her bed, tears falling from her eyes. She had opened that floodgate and she knew that there was no logical way to stop it. Sighing, she knew that now she was going to have to tell Nick everything. She had already told him too much. She was embarrassed that he knew.

Nick's head poked through the doorway. "Sara? Are you okay?"

Sara scoffed and looked away. _Of course I'm not okay. But I haven't been okay for a while, not that you've noticed._

Nick came in the bedroom and sat beside her. "Sara, I'm sorry. If I had known, I never would have said…"

Sara cut him off like she had earlier. "Nick, look. I know you mean well. I just need to figure out how to deal with this."

Nick sighed. "All right. I need to call Catherine anyways. She doesn't know that I'm not coming in for my shift." He started walking across the room. "You don't need to deal with this alone, Sara. You can talk to me. I'm here whenever you need me." Walking out of the room, Nick returned to where he had spent the night: flipping channels on the T.V.

Sara eased herself into a lying down position on her bed. Thoughts whirled about her mind, and she didn't do anything to stop them. She was just so tired of always having to deal with things. She knew that Nick was right, and that she could talk to him. But Sara Sidle had always solved her own problems ever since she was young, and she wasn't about to stop now.

Closing her eyes, for a moment, she found herself drifting back off into sleep.

Nick 

_Who would believe  
What a date you would be  
If I knew I'd have thought about knowing _

_And in between now and the last time we met  
I'd open the door if I met you again  
And I swear that we'd be better/fair ever friends  
From here until 10 miles from nowhere _

Nick sat in front of the T.V. for what seemed like hours. He stared out the window and saw the dark clouds covering the sky. He wasn't even sure what time it was anymore. Reaching for his cell phone, he dialed his supervisor's number.

"Willows."

"Catherine, it's Nick."

"Nick, what can I do for you?"

"I'm at Sara's."

"Oh." Catherine went silent.

"Catherine, I… She needs me to be here right now."

"I can't spare you tonight Nicky. I wish I could."

"Please, Catherine. Consider this me calling in sick."

"Nick, Grissom is already down Sara. I can't afford to be down you as well."

Nick sighed. He knew that this wasn't going to be an easy call. He needed to find a way to get Catherine to understand. "Catherine, something happened to Sara. I'm not sure which. But she's hurt and someone needs to take care of her. She is refusing to go to the hospital."

"What happened?" At this point, it dawned on Nick that Grissom hadn't mentioned it to Catherine yet.

"I don't know. She won't tell me. All I know is that it has something to do with the crime scene she was processing and a suspect she was questioning." Nick rubbed his face with his hands. "Look, Catherine, I know that this may sound stupid, but I haven't exactly been there for her in the past, and I need to be here for her now."

Catherine sighed. "Fine. I'll have to pull Greg or someone."

"Thanks." Nick hung up before she could refute his request for time off.

Standing up, Nick walked down the hallway to Sara's room. Pushing the door open lightly, he saw her sleeping peacefully on the bed. Tip-toeing in, he grabbed the blanket from the foot of the bed and covered her with it. Kissing her forehead, he whispered, "I'm going to be here for you Sara. I promise."

Sara 

_What is that there  
In your brown paper box  
I can see that you kept all the memories we'd lost _

_I'd sworn it was you  
Who was destined and gone  
To the pressure of past undertakings _

Sara woke up a few hours later, feeling somewhat better. She got out of bed slowly, and walked down the hall to the living room. "Nick?"

Nick looked up from the T.V. show that he was watching. "Yeah, Sar?"

"Can I sit with you for a while?"

Nick looked at her strangely for a moment, and then shifted over so that she could sit next to him. " Sure thing. It's your place, not mine. You can sit wherever you want."

Sara sat down next to him and remained silent for what seemed like an eternity. "Nick, look, I owe you an apology."

Nick looked at her and shook his head. "No, you don't Sara. You were upset, that's all."

"No, Nick, there is more to it than that."

"Oh?" Nick perked up and turned toward her. "What more is there?"

Sara looked down at her hands. "Nick, I forgot that you have been in this situation before, and I probably went ahead and brought it all back for you and for that, I am truly sorry."

Nick turned to face her and sighed. "Well, Sara, you're right, I was thinking about Nigel and the other times I have been in front of a weapon, but this time, it was about you. Not me."

Sara melted against him and started sobbing in earnest. "Oh God, Nick, it was horrible. It was truly one of the most terrifying moments of my life." Putting her head on his shoulder she looked up and him through tear-filled eyes. "How did you do it? How did you deal with it? You seem to have come away without too many ill-effects."

"Yeah, you learn to move on."

Sara shrugged. "I guess."

Nick reached for her hand and held it. "Sara, tell me what happened. Please? I'm worried about you."

Sara sighed, unsure of what she should actually say. "All right."

Nick sat and waited for her to begin, trying really hard not to pressure her into anything too quickly.

"Grissom and I were sent to an Institution for the Mentally Handicapped. There had been cases of people being raped and we were there to discover what happened." Sara paused for a moment, and then continued her tale. "I was in a room with a suspect who wasn't allowed to leave because he was the prime suspect. Of course, he was more comfortable with a female in the room only, so myself being that stupid, I went along with it. Next thing I knew, I was against the wall, pinned by the sheer weight of him. He was grinding against me, pretending to rape me. He had my gun out and at my head." Tears began to spill again in earnest. "I could see Grissom out the corner of my eye and he was trying to get in. I saw him pick up a chair, and try to break through the door. The suspect continued his assault by tossing me into the table, and then I fell to the floor, where he landed on top of me. My gun was still in his hand, albeit with a looser grip."

Nick just stared at her and listened. He hadn't thought it had been as bad as this.

"So, the guards finally got the door open, but hauling him off me was a problem. He wouldn't let go of my arms." Sara exhaled sharply. "Finally, they got him off of me."

"Sara, I had no idea… I never imagined it was that horrible." Pulling her closer too him, he held her. He kissed the top of her head. "You have every right to be upset right now, Sara. I wouldn't tell anyone."

Sara smiled a little. "I know, thanks. But I think just talking to you helped."

"So, what happened after he was removed from the room?"

"I ran from the room and down the hallway, nearly knocking Greg over."

"Then why isn't he here, now, with you?"

Sara shrugged. "He has a case to solve." _What are you getting at Stokes?_

"I guess, but so did I. I dropped it with Catherine at the end of shift. Told her that you needed me and that I wasn't leaving until you didn't anymore."

Sara smiled and buried her head into his chest. "Thank you, Nick."

"Anytime Sara, anytime." Nick smiled. He would love to hold her like this everyday. He wanted to, but knew that this moment wouldn't be the best time to bring that subject up with her. _Guess I'll just have to be a better friend to her first._ The revelation came to him as he heard her breathing soften. She was drifting off to sleep, finally able to relax a bit more.

_Had I had known that it might have been me  
I might have returned a letter or three  
Or gave you a call from the sanctuary _

_for the cracks in these walls tell time for a fee _

_From here until 10...  
From now until 10...miles from nowhere _

Song: 10 Miles From Nowhere © Five for Fighting, CD: Message for Albert

Next Chapter: Nick and Sara get a little bit closer!

Thanks for R&Ring!

Lisa


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer: The usual… Don't own them**

**Thanks to everyone who replied! Sorry this chapter is shorter than usual. I wanted to get _something_ posted before the end of this weekend! Sorry it took so long. I know I mentioned that Nick and Sara were going to get closer this chapter, but the story kinda took over. It will happen, I promise!**

Chapter 3 

Nick woke up to feel Sara's arms around him, her head on his chest. She was still sleeping soundly. He smiled at their conversation the day before. He was glad that she had opened up to him.

Nick kissed the top of her head. "Sara, honey. Wake up."

"MMff." Sara mumbled. Opening her eyes slowly, she became more and more aware of her surroundings. It took a few moments to realize that she had spent the entire night with her arms wrapped around Nick. Scrambling to unwind herself from his arms, she pulled backwards. Gasping in pain, her face lost all color.

_Oh I'm newly calibrated  
All shiny and clean  
I'm your recent adaptation  
Time to redefine me_

"Sara?" Nick said, looking at her, not liking the sudden change of color of her skin. "Are you okay?"

Sara slowly started to breathe again. "My ribs… I can barely… breathe." She wheezed a few more times before Nick stood up and helped her up as well.

"Come on Sara. We're taking you to the hospital. I don't care if you want to or not."

Sara nodded. "Fine."

Slowly the two CSI's made their way to the door. "My keys are by the door on the table." Nick reached for them and continued to propel Sara down the hallway. They got to the top of the stairs. "Sara, maybe you should rethink your living area. You need an elevator."

"I… Can.. . Walk." Sara said between breaths.

Nick shook his head. In a matter of seconds, he had Sara in his arms, and they were walking down the stairs. "Just hang on there sweetie. It won't be long and you'll be sitting in the truck."

Sara nodded and rested her head against Nick's shoulder. She was just so tired. She struggled every time she tried to take a breath. She was beginning to wonder if she had been wrong with her diagnosis.

_Let the word out I've got to get out  
Oh I'm feeling better now  
Break the news out I've got to get out  
Oh I'm feeling better now _

Oh I'm happy as Christmas  
All wrapped to be seen  
I'm your recent acquisition  
Time to celebrate me

True to his word, the next thing Sara knew, she was sitting the Denali.

"Nick…" She gasped as she tried desperately to feed air into her lungs.

"Sara, conserve your energy. I'll get you there ASAP." Nick was happy that he drove a police issued vehicle. If he got pulled over, they would surely be known.

Sara felt her eyes starting to droop, and her brain began to get fuzzy. Everything around her was happening in slow motion. She needed to stay awake.

"Sara, stay with me here. Try breathing in and out."

Sara stared at Nick, trying to understand what he said, but everything was lost on her. She felt her world grow dark as Nick pulled into the Emergency Room Entrance.

Nick jumped out of his Denali and rushed to the passenger side. Undoing Sara's seat belt, he slipped his arms underneath hers. In his mind, he was a little concerned about what the nurses would think, but in the end, he didn't care. He just wanted Sara to be okay. Nick rushed inside with Sara. He eyed a doctor walking in the unusually quiet E.R. "Hey! Help!" Nick's commanding voice echoed through the hospitals hallways.

The doctor rushed over and a nurse went to get a gurney. "What happened?"

Nick lay Sara down on the gurney. "It's a long story. Her name is Sara Sidle and she's a CSI. She was involved in an altercation with a suspect. She believed her ribs to be bruised, but didn't do anything about her injuries. She woke up gasping for breath."

The doctor eyed him suspiciously. "And you are?"

"Nick Stokes. I am also a CSI. We work together. Please, just help her."

The doctor pushed Sara toward an examination room and closed the door behind him and his team of nurses.

Nick had nothing to do but sit and wait. Picking up his phone, he stepped outside for a few moments to make a couple of calls.

"Grissom."

"Grissom, it's Nick."

"Nick, what can I do for you?"

"Well, it's more what you could do for Sara."

"What's wrong?" Grissom's voice picked up a few octaves.

"She collapsed. She had difficulty breathing. We're at the hospital." Nick pinched the bridge of his nose. He hadn't been this stressed in a while.

"I'm on my way."

_Let the word out I've got to get out  
Oh I'm feeling better now  
Break the news out I've got to get out  
Oh I'm feeling better now_

The next person on his list was Warrick.

"Brown."

"Rick, it's Nick."

"Nicky, my boy, what's up." Warrick sounded happy to hear from his friend.

"Can you meet me at the hospital?" Nick listed off the coordinates and hung up. He was sure Grissom would tell Catherine. Besides, it wasn't like they could all put their casework aside.

Nick returned to the waiting room and did just that, wait.

Over an hour later, Warrick, Grissom and Catherine walked in. "Nick, what happened?"

Nick exhaled and ran a hand through his hair. " Sara collapsed."

Warrick sat down on his left and Catherine sat on his right. "She's going to be fine Nicky. Don't worry." Catherine said soothingly.

Nick nodded. "I know."

_The world's done shaking  
The world's done shaking  
The world's done shaking me down _

The world's done shaking  
The world's done shaking  
The world's done shaking me down

Please R&R!

Song: Better Now by: Collective Soul

Thanks!

Lisa


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